Today's Oxymoron: "Forgotten Memories"

Last night I was a small flying dragon. I was passing over the heads of the patrons of a small diner/arcade who looked more annoyed than fascinated enough to say, "hey look, a little dragon is flying over our heads!"

Leaving the building, I realized that I had two front arms in addition to wings, which is not typical of flying reptiles at all. So my body morphed into a more pterodactyl type shape, where my front arms had flesh membranes spreading from my fingers to my hips. I landed on the beach and saw a group of now extinct sea birds who resembled pelicans, but had iridescent blue-black feathers.

Suddenly, I found myself on the roof of a house that was being flooded. Now back to human, I had to save myself from the rising waters by climbing into a window on the top floor. After I did this, however, the water disappeared. There was a family in there having sandwiches and watching TV. On the tube, to my surprise, were my mom, my stepdad, my sister, and all of my douche-bag step brothers. It looked as if they had just won the lottery or something. Even though I felt an obligation to watch the screen, I really didn't want to and I looked away.

Douche Bag!

You can no more convince a douche bag to stop being a douche bag than you can convince water to stop being wet.